I have always had the desire to share my thoughts to the world. With that, I cannot count how many times I have started writing a blog post on WordPress, or even just jotting down my thoughts on a notebook. Every time I would think,
“This time – yes, this time will be when I finally start writing my thoughts and share them with the world!”
Every time I did attempt however, I would finish writing a draft entry but I never clicked ‘Publish’. I would be reviewing my article over and over again. I would be stuck in the never ending cycle of ‘perfecting’ my article. I would have perhaps spent over 20 minutes reviewing each sentence. I would be gruelling over the thought that my writing skills were horrible and such abominations would only attract the laughter of its unfortunate readers.
By the time I reached the end of the process of reviewing my own work, I would be mentally too exhausted. The criticism dawned upon myself by myself would tire me to the end of my wits. As a result, the journey that started with me being full of hope would have ended with me feeling self defeated. I would have thought to myself,
“I am not good enough to do this”.
But enough is enough.
The best you, is the real you.
When I reflected back on the why I was fearful of putting my thoughts out on the world, I came to the conclusion that my cowering from publishing was due to the super high expectation I had put on myself. I had the notion that every single piece of word that I publish to the public had to be of super high quality. It was this level of self-expectation that crippled me.
I always looked up to writers and speakers who seemed to be able to spit out wisdom in smooth lyrical fashion. My mistake was that I had compared my own newbie work to theirs. I was competing with legends when I had only begun my journey. I now realise that, indeed, the journey of a thousand miles, starts with a first step.
In my head, I was dreaming of becoming a thought leader who had infallible and timeless wisdom. But, I was quick to forget that the best way to be the best version of yourself, is to be yourself. This meant to show up as myself in all its glory: the good, the bad as well as the ugly.
Document, don’t create
I needed to realise that it was fine to make mistakes and to show my shortcomings of my thoughts to the world. In the effort of putting my thoughts out to the world, there will surely be those who would point out the gaps in my thoughts. There will be countless imperfections in my expressions and opposing stances to my opinions. Those are the rites of passage of becoming the best version of myself.
Think about it: you can ponder about the strategy behind every post and fabricate yourself into this “influential person”… or you can just be yourself.
Gary Vaynerchuck
As expressed by Gary V in this article, my aim should be to document my thoughts. Rather than trying to create an image of rockstar or a superhero, I can simply be my true self. Rather than trying to sell my thoughts as being the best there ever is (which it would never be), I can simply document and share them as is. That in itself is valuable and holds unique merit.
This lesson is something I have been learning from producing a weekly podcast with my friends, and one that I intend to remember as I proceed with my writing journey.
Stay humble,
Ruiz